Blue Ribbon
by obasan45
Summary: Rated M for theme only. Pairing: Koyu/Shuei, Reishin/Kijin. and Reishin/Setsuna? Warning: yaoi, yaoi, and yaoi. Time-fit: couple of years after the end of anime seasone 1.
1. You Can Never Go Home Again

**Title : ****Blue Ribbon I (You Can Never Go Home Again)**

**Disclaimer :** **I don't own Saiunkoku Monogatari. It belongs to Sai Yukino.**

**Rating : M**** for theme only**

**Genre : ****Angst**

**Warnings : ****Yaoi, mentions of**

**Pairing :** **Koyu/Shuei**

**Summary : ****Set two years after the end of Season 1 of the anime. After two months of searching for the missing Shuei, Koyu finds him in a brothel.**

**Notes : ****This was written in response to the LJ Saiun_Challenge prompt "You Can Never Go Home Again"**

**PLEASE REVIEW. EVEN IF YOU ARE NOT A MEMBER, I APPRECIATE YOUR NOT-LOGGED-IN COMMENTS (MY RESPONSE WILL BE ON THE REVIEW PAGE IF I CAN'T SEND YOU A PM).**

* * *

"Blue Ribbon? A thousand apologies, young master! Blue Ribbon is fully booked for tonight. If I could suggest . . . "

Koyu placed a small but heavy cloth-wrapped package into the oily brothel owner's hands. The deal was done. Koyu had the Blue Ribbon's services for the night.

The décor was loud and tasteless, a far cry from Koga House. Koyu kept his gaze fixed on the open doorway. A tall figure stepped in, bowed, and turned to shut the double-paneled door. His long dark hair was tied by a single deep indigo ribbon.

_Shuei.  
_  
Koyu had deliberately sat in the shadows. He waved towards the chair in the middle of the room. Shuei took in the specially prepared chair, his placid expression unchanged. He dropped his robe. Even though the report had detailed every scar, Koyu had to bite down on his lower lip to stop himself from crying out.

Shuei strapped himself into the restraints. He waited. Naked. Eyes lowered. As he had done every night for the past two months.

Koyu picked up the discarded robe and covered Shuei's body with it. Surprised by this act of kindness, Shuei looked up. They looked at each other in silence.

"How did you find me?"

"That's not important. Stop punishing yourself, Shuei. It won't bring my sister and my mother back to life."

The placid face finally came alive. Barely. Shuei's lips curled mockingly.  
"So says the one who defiles his body with nameless lovers trawled from the alleys every night, in an endless cycle of self-loathing."

Koyu flushed, but said nothing.

"At least my punishment makes sense. Your mother died a low-class prostitute, and that is what I'm aspiring towards. Yours, Koyu, has no relation to your crime."

"You bastard! How about you tell me what to do? How does a son atone for deserting his mother?"

Shuei's features softened.  
"I'm sorry, Koyu."  
He continued gently.  
"Can't you forgive yourself, Koyu? You were only eight. Your mother tried to rape you. You ran away from home. You lost your memory. How _could _you have returned to save her from being evicted by your father?"

"That's NOT the point, Shuei. I ran away, fully aware of the consequences. After the miscarriage, my father had clearly stated that the Third Concubine will be housed and fed only for as long as her son needs her. I caused my mother to be thrown out onto the streets."  
Koyu, emotionally exhausted, slumped forward, and held his head in his hands.

Shuei looked at the mop of layered green hair. He mumbled, half to himself.  
"Chrysanthemum. Green chrysanthemum. That was what she called you. I thought you were a girl. An angry little girl that leapt onto my back while I was inside your mother, and tore the blue ribbon from my hair."

Shuei closed his eyes.  
"What happened to that ribbon, Koyu?"

"My mother kept it."

"Even after what I did to her."

"You didn't know the consequences. And you left before the spasms started."

"I was sixteen. I should have known. Or thought to ask. Or at least had enough decency not to fuck a close-to-full-term pregnant woman!"

"My mother knew the risk, Shuei. It was her decision. It was not your fault."

"The hell it wasn't! I was a monster. She begged me to come back again after her delivery, but I told her I wouldn't have sex with her if she weren't pregnant!"  
Shuei's voice broke.

Koyu wrapped his hands over Shuei's tightly clenched fists that were tied to the arms of the chair.  
"Hush, Shuei. We both know you said that as you were afraid to father any children."  
Koyu hesitated.  
"Shuei, why don't you come back to Kyo? Come home with me."

Shuei laughed harshly. Koyu paled, but he didn't remove his hands from Shuei's fists.

"Go home with you? Have you forgotten what you did, and said? You grabbed my penis and almost yanked it off, all the while screaming that it was the murder weapon that killed your sister and mother. Are you saying that you will allow me to penetrate you with this murder weapon, now, or ever?"

Koyu studied Shuei's impossibly placid face, searching for the man he knew.  
"Shuei, please, I'm sorry I said that. I was not rational. That bit of memory had just surfaced. I didn't mean it."

"Just like you didn't mean it when you dragged me to your hometown, to the spot where your mother died, and made me strip on the busy street, to display my murder weapon?"

Shuei's breath was coming fast. His face contorted. Koyu instinctively reached out a hand. Shuei twisted his face sharply away. Koyu hesitated, and let his hand drop to his side.

"Forgive me, Shuei. I turned my anger against myself onto you. I realized that right after you disappeared. I'm so sorry. Shuei, I'm not saying that we can ignore everything and resume being lovers. But can we start over? We are both on self-destructive paths. If we stick together, we might survive."

After a long while, Shuei spoke.  
"I'm not interested in surviving. I just want to die the same way your mother did."

Shuei saw Koyu's face, and said quietly,  
"You are not being realistic, Koyu."  
He shrugged off the robe covering his body.  
"This, Koyu, is what I am. Even after all that has happened, I still get aroused just being near you. Can't you see there is no way I can live with you and not have sex with you? You did well to make me strap myself down, otherwise I will be forcing myself on you."

"You know that's not true, Shuei."

"You _don't_ know that that's not true, Koyu, admit it."

Shuei paused.  
"Koyu, I forgive you for making me strip in your hometown. Please, Koyu, don't look for me again. Go home."

_Home_.  
Watching Koyu leave, Shuei recalled whispering "I'm home" in Koyu's ear on their wedding day.  
He bent over in his chair, chest constricted from the pain of unshed tears.  
_I can never go home again._

**[The End]**

* * *

**Notes:**

**1) Koyu's sexual abuse by his mother was first briefly mentioned in chapter 6 of my fanfic Twin Irises. When Reishin met him running the lottery stall, Koyu had no memory of his past. **

**2) Shuei's fear of fathering children was talked about in my fanfic The General's Man.**

**3) The "wedding day" refers to the day when Shuei formally brought Koyu home to the Ran Manor, as described in chapter 7 of my fanfic Twin Irises.**


	2. Secret Letters

**Title : ****Blue Ribbon II (Secret Letters)**

**Disclaimer :** **I don't own Saiunkoku Monogatari. It belongs to Sai Yukino.**

**Rating : ****T for theme only**

**Genre : ****Angst**

**Warnings : ****Yaoi, mentions of**

**Pairing :** **Koyu/Shuei, but they are not present; slight hints of a possible Reishin/Setsuna**

**Summary : ****Reishin goes to the Ran Province to confront the Ran triplets about their sixteen-year-old secret that has a direct impact on Koyu and Shuei's happiness.**

**Notes : ****This was written in response to the LJ Saiun_Challenge prompt "Secret Letters".**

**PLEASE REVIEW. EVEN IF YOU ARE NOT A MEMBER, I APPRECIATE YOUR NOT-LOGGED-IN COMMENTS (MY RESPONSE WILL BE ON THE REVIEW PAGE IF I CAN'T SEND YOU A PM).**

* * *

The three Ran Setsunas sat reading three identical spy reports.

Yuki's eyes lifted from the report to look at his third brother.  
"It seems you have struck gold, Hana, Li Koyu has indeed found Shuei. You've redeemed yourself for your incompetence in losing track of Shuei two months ago."

Tsuki laughed.  
"Eldest brother, surely you can't be pleased that obnoxious little Reishin's spies have outdone our own! Besides, the second half of the report is somewhat troubling, isn't it? It appears that the brat has found out our little secret."

Setsuna frowned at his second sibling.  
"Take this matter a little more seriously, will you? Lord Reishin's not a little brat anymore, and neither are we. Let it rest, Tsuki, that was almost three decades ago. We only have four hours before he arrives. And while you sort out all the spy reports pertaining to this matter, practice saying _Lord _Reishin."

"That's sixteen years of reports! Why isn't Hana helping out?"

"He'll have his hands full preparing his wife to meet Lord Reishin. I hear that Lord Reishin has very little patience, and none at all with women. Hana, if your wife should so much as quiver in front of Lord Reishin, you'll have me to answer to."

Watching the real Ran Setsuna leave the room, one Ran Setsuna copy said to the other,  
"It'll be fun confusing that Reishin brat again."

* * *

Reishin adjusted his body, trying to find a more comfortable position. No position was right after so many hours on the road. Even the best carriages, with the best suspension, cannot make travel on such bumpy inter-city roads comfortable.

Reishin had brought with him the two letters. Why, he had no idea, since they were obviously written and sent in secret, and as such cannot be produced as evidence. The first letter came to him just under two months ago. The letter was totally devoid of the usual cloying formalities, and came straight to the point, open and sincere. The writer identified himself as Ran Setsuna.

Reishin once again felt his irritation rise at that name. The Ran triplets live publicly as one person. From birth, it would seem. Shoka was their tutor when they were kids, and that was how Reishin came to know the bizarre three-in-one Ran Setsuna. They share the same name, dress the same, style their hair the same, have the same mannerisms, and very deliberately set out to confuse everyone they met. And if there was one thing Reishin detested, it was to be put at a disadvantage. Facing off with three Setsunas definitely counts as one such instance. In spite of Shoka's efforts, the conflict between Reishin and the triplets escalated.

**[Flashback]**

**Reishin knew he was in trouble. He was cornered.**

"**You. Stop trying to trick us, to tell us apart."  
" We've given you enough warning."  
"It's time we taught you a lesson."**

**The Setsunas closed in. The one behind him grabbed the collars of both his outer and inner shirts. Reishin felt panic rising. Reishin was terrified of exposing the scars, old as well as fresh, on his back. Having to endure his father's beatings was bad enough. Reishin couldn't take the humiliation of anyone except his brother Shoka seeing those scars. Reishin felt the hands pulling down on the collars. And then they froze.**

**The Setsuna behind him said,  
"We'll just leave it as a final warning. The next time, we'll strip you naked."**

**Reishin felt his collars pulled back up, and he was shoved forward. He stumbled. As he righted himself, he saw, momentarily, an individual in the Setsuna that walked around him to join his brothers. This boy glancing sideways at him had an expression that set him apart from the other two. And then it was gone. Reishin never had a chance to thank him. The three separated and coalesced seamlessly, and Reishin never found that individual again. **

Reishin touched the letters through the silk of his shirt. The first letter had asked Reishin to allow the Ran agents to "tag along" in Reishin's agents' tracking of the lost Shuei. The writer had assured Reishin that the Ran family will not approach Shuei until after Koyu has. It was a strange request but reasonable enough, and Reishin had instructed his agents accordingly. The only fault Reishin could find with the letter was the inappropriate post-script – "When we met again at the wedding, Lord Reishin, I had a very favourable impression of you. You have the most beautiful hands."

The second letter almost stopped Reishin's heart. As the writer anticipated, Reishin wanted to leave for the Ran province immediately. But he couldn't, the writer had clearly stated that, in exchange for the confidential information divulged, Reishin must not take action until after Koyu had found Shuei.

Reishin fretted in his seat. Two more hours, and he would be face to face with the Ran triplets.  
_Which triplet revealed the sixteen-year-old Ran secret? Was it HIM? _

* * *

Hana knew exactly where to find his wife at this time in the morning, tending to her favourite blooms. He had scoured Saiunkoku to find this plant. Green chrysanthemums - the only connection to her lost son.

Yuki watched from afar as Hana embraced his wife.  
_He was supposed to keep her alive, not marry her!  
- __barren  
- __his_ _senior_ _by_ _seven_ _years.  
- __hand_-_me_-_down_ _from_ _his_ _younger_ _brother.  
__And yet he appears happy. He doesn't even seem to mind that she still keeps Shuei's blue ribbon.  
_Yuki shook his head, smiling slightly, and left to attend to the urgent matter of retrieving Shuei.

* * *

Reishin stared at the woman who bore Koyu. He felt cold, sick to the stomach.  
"You? It was your idea to fake your death? Do you know what Koyu and Shuei are going through?"

"Yes. The report on Shuei came in this morning. As for Koyu . . ."

"Wait. Why are _you _calling him 'Koyu'?"

"Because he is your son. I lost him the day he ran away."

"Don't you mean the day you attempted to rape him?"  
Reishin spat out.

She flinched, but held her gaze, and said unevenly.  
"Yes, the day I attempted to rape him."

_No excuses. No mention of post-natal depression, of post-miscarriage emotional trauma.  
_Reishin had read the physician's expert report that was attached to the spy report.  
_She's like Koyu after all, Koyu never gives himself the easy way out.  
_Reishin nodded in grudging respect.

"Why did you fake your death?"

She unconsciously glanced at her husband, then back at Reishin.  
"Ha . . . Setsuna located me at the brothel. He offered to buy me out, to set me up in a safe place, to provide for my keep. That was the Ran sense of responsibility. He had been sent to clean up Shuei's mess."

She paused.  
"Setsuna told me that Koyu had run to Kyo, was adopted by a court official, and appeared settled and happy. He also told me that Koyu's father hadn't given up his search for Koyu. I begged him to help stage my death so that Koyu's father cannot trace Koyu through me. And, as I was not aware at that time that Koyu had lost his memory, I assumed that Koyu had no desire to ever look me up again."

Reishin processed the information.  
"Accepted. But is there any reason to withhold the truth _now_?"

One of the Setsunas answered.  
"If it were just Shuei, we wouldn't hesitate. Shuei's will is not strong. He puts too much store on fate."  
He handed Reishin the relevant spy report before he continued.  
"Like the talk they had when Koyu found Shuei. Koyu wanted to beat fate, to survive what fate had thrown at them. Shuei just wanted to die."

Setsuna paused.  
"However, this weakness is also his strength. Shuei's tendency to bow to fate would probably mean that he would see the news that Koyu's mother is alive as a reprieve. In spite of everything he's gone through these past two months, we believe that Shuei will bounce back."

Setsuna looked directly at Reishin.  
"Lord Reishin, we need your input on Koyu. His mother's gut feel is that news of her being alive, if revealed to Koyu now, would in fact be detrimental to Koyu's healing."  
He turned his body slightly to allow Koyu's mother to speak.

"Lord Reishin, please bear with this story. When Koyu was seven, there was a scandal involving a servant girl. She started off as Koyu's personal maid. Once, in a petty tantrum, Koyu dismissed her. She was transferred to another serving position. She was then dismissed for forgetting, over several consecutive dinners, to place the soya sauce on the dining table as per instructions. Her next mistress, the Fifth Concubine, was very beautiful but insecure about her bony wrists. She didn't like it that this servant girl had nice, rounded, padded wrists. And so it went on. With each transfer the girl's situation worsened. She was abused and violated. Finally her bloated body was found floating in the river. Koyu, the Fifth Concubine, and all her previous mistresses and masters who had dismissed her for trivial reasons were eaten up by guilt. It was subsequently discovered that the dead body was not hers. She had exchanged clothes with a peasant girl from the town before she ran away. With this discovery, all the guilt evaporated, as though all the wrongs had never happened. All except Koyu. His guilt remained. What he learnt from the incident, to treat servants better, also remained."

She took a deep breath, and continued.  
" What I am trying to say, Lord Reishin, is that for Koyu, the truth was not the issue. What was important was the process he went through. From being incapacitated by guilt, to rousing himself from that useless state, to making some good come out of that guilt. Koyu, right now, is still stuck in a self-loathing, self-destructive stage. If the truth is revealed to him now, the process of healing stops. In other words . . . "

Reishin held up a palm to stop her from going on.  
"The only possible excuse for your selfishness is what is popularly known as mother's love. How dare you even suggest that Shuei's health, life, and sanity be put at further risk, just so as to allow Koyu that luxury? You are very much mistaken if you think that I am as small-minded as you."

Reishin turned to Setsuna, seething with a cold rage.  
"And what excuse do _you _have? From all that I have heard, you are wise and fair. What is clouding your judgement? And how well do you know your brother? Shuei has given up because he believes that Koyu stands a better chance of pulling himself out of this mess _without _him. It's not because he's weak-willed and bows to fate. If he feels that Koyu needs him he would live on and fight!"

Setsuna asked quietly.  
"And what is your opinion? Does Koyu need him? Or will Koyu heal better with Shuei out of his life?"

Reishin scrutinized the face before him. Tensed, but open. His anger subsided.  
_Is this him? The letter-writer? The Individual?_  
"The only way for Koyu and Shuei to heal is to do it _together. _There is no other way, not just because their fates are intertwined, but because they love each other. Is that so hard to understand?"

"No, it's not. But why doesn't Shuei see that?"

"Because he's always been an idiot about this! "

" 'This'?"

Reishin stared at Setsuna, almost in desperation. Reishin knew, intuitively, that Shuei had always felt that Koyu didn't need him. But now, faced with Shuei's brother, what was he supposed to say? In fact, he had already stepped out of line, in his earlier agitated state.

Setsuna smiled slightly.  
"It's alright, Lord Reishin. In truth, I can't claim to know Shuei very well. He left for Kyo at sixteen, not quite yet a man. Sixteen years of spy reports only tell me about his actions, not about his thoughts and motivations. What they _do _tell me is that Shuei has come to be very close to you. Also, even in his very infrequent and short letters home, I can see that he holds you in great respect and affection."  
Setsuna inclined his elegantly coiffed head a little, in a wordless invitation to Reishin to speak.

"A long time ago, Shuei said this to me: 'I will stay by Koyu's side, for as long as he allows it'. At that time, they were in love, but not yet lovers. Three months ago, we were drinking together during the Mid-Autumn Festival, and got a little tipsy. Kijin, who didn't drink, related to me subsequently that Shuei was toasting to the moon, and declaring that he was the luckiest man because Koyu was willing to have him."

Reishin felt his eyes smarting. He took a moment before he continued.  
"Shuei sees their relationship as unbalanced; he feels that he needs Koyu, a whole lot more than Koyu needs him. And now, being the one responsible for Koyu's mother's miscarriage, Shuei must feel that his presence will only cause Koyu pain. He's a fool to think that. But of course Koyu's at fault too. Koyu is fiercely independent, always makes himself out to be stronger than he is, and will die rather than ask for help!"

"Didn't Koyu ask for help, that day when he located Shuei? Shuei was the one who turned him down by choosing to die."

"That's not good enough! Not when Shuei has this complex about Koyu not needing him. Koyu told Shuei to stop punishing himself. Koyu asked Shuei to come live with him. Koyu said that if they stuck together, they might survive. All throughout, Koyu still didn't reveal his vulnerability, he was still being the 'strong' one. That wouldn't, and didn't work, because Shuei . . . , I don't know! Maybe because Shuei doesn't want to be saved by Koyu, maybe because he feels that he has brought enough grief into Koyu's life."

Reishin lost his battle, one tear slid down his cheek. He impatiently waved away the silk handkerchief offered by Setsuna, and continued.  
"Koyu has to come out and ask Shuei to help _him, _that's the only way to get Shuei to stop destroying himself."

Setsuna, all this while watching Reishin with an inscrutable expression, finally voiced his question.  
"Lord Reishin, where do you stand with regards to the question of whether to reveal the truth about Koyu's mother being alive?"

Stumped, Reishin blinked.  
_He's right. Where do I stand? It seems I've been talking as though she's still dead!  
Do I actually agree with her that the truth should be withheld for the moment?  
Do I feel that Koyu and Shuei need to work out these issues BEFORE the truth is revealed?_

Reishin felt his two hands brought together gently, clasped between . . . Setsuna's hands!  
_Why is he HOLDING me?_

Setsuna looked up from their clasped hands. Reishin stared into Setsuna's violet eyes, too stunned to pull his hands away. Setsuna smiled warmly.

"Lord Reishin, I will leave the decision in your capable, and very beautiful, hands."  
So saying, Setsuna released Reishin. The violet eyes laughed, twinkling in its amethyst depths.

_The letter-writer!  
_Reishin stared into Setsuna's eyes, speechless.  
_A lighter shade than Shuei's. Brighter. Livelier._

Setsuna continued.  
"I am now convinced that you are the best person to make the decision as to when and how the truth about Koyu's mother is revealed. Furthermore, I will not take umbrage at your abduction of a Ran."

Reishin started.  
_How did he trace that to me? Kijin couldn't have been so careless!_

Setsuna smiled at Reishin's reaction.  
"It appears that your man beat mine in retrieving Shuei. The report said that Shuei was carried off, unconscious, slumped over the shoulder of a man clad all in black. The lower half of his face was covered by a black cloth, and above that were the painted eyes of a wooden mask."

_Ohhh . . . I'm going to KILL Kijin for this humiliation!  
Wait a minute, did Setsuna put an inflection on "your man"?  
_Reishin blushed.

"Lord Reishin, I leave my brother in your care. And by the way, Lord Reishin, don't be too hard on your man."  
This time, Setsuna laughed outright.

As Reishin walked past him, he gave Reishin's collar a gentle tug. Reishin spun around, to look into laughing eyes.

The other two Setsunas exchanged concerned glances. They stayed silent till Reishin left the room.  
"Brother Yuki, what was that about?"  
"If you trying to get us killed, can you at least let us know why?"

* * *

Reishin stopped walking. He leaned against the ornate column for support.  
_It IS him! Why did he reveal himself?  
Brother Shoka told me just the other day the real reason behind the Ran triplets presenting themselves as one person to the public. It was the norm in the Ran family to deal with multiple births by keeping the eldest, and killing off the rest. In this instance, the two younger triplets were allowed to live on the condition that no one can tell them apart. The moment anyone can do that, they will be killed!_

Reishin decided that this was not the time to think about this. He needed to focus on getting Koyu and Shuei together.

**[The End]**

* * *

**Notes:**

**1) The Ran triplets' names (Yuki, Tsuki, and Hana), the fact that Shoka was their tutor when they were kids, and the fact that the triplets and Reishin detested each other, can be found in Charmain's translation of the light novels. FFnet bars all references to url addresses, so search for it under "parahelia", look for the "yuzutea" website, at /log2007/10/saiunkoku-12-12/**

**2) The scars on Reishin's back are the result of constant beatings by his father. The story behind this is detailed in my fanfic, Brother Shoka.**

**3) Reishin's mention of Shuei having once said "I will stay by Koyu's side, for as long as he allows it" is a reference to the events that took place in chapter 4 of my fanfic, Twin Irises.**

**4) I've always wondered if Kijin, having to wear a mask for such a large part of the day, would end up forgetting to take off his mask when he's supposed to be in his naked face. And that's how that little bit about Kijin wearing his mask beneath his black cloth face cover came about! ^_^**

**5) The fact that the Ran triplets live publicly as one person, that normally the other two would have been killed, that they were allowed to live on condition that they cannot be told apart, can be found in Charmain's translation of the light novels at /log/2007/10/saiunkoku-12-22/ (refer to note 1 above).**


	3. Letting Go

**Title : ****Blue Ribbon III (Letting Go)**

**Disclaimer :** **I don't own Saiunkoku Monogatari. It belongs to Sai Yukino.**

**Rating : ****T for theme only**

**Genre :** **Hurt/Comfort**

**Warnings : ****Yaoi, mild**

**Pairing :** **Koyu/Shuei**

**Summary :** **Brought together by Reishin's trickery, Koyu and Shuei go through the awkwardness of adjusting to each other, and the slow process of healing.**

**Notes : ****This was written in response to the LJ Saiun_Challenge prompt "Letting Go".**

**PLEASE REVIEW. EVEN IF YOU ARE NOT A MEMBER, I APPRECIATE YOUR NOT-LOGGED-IN COMMENTS (MY RESPONSE WILL BE ON THE REVIEW PAGE IF I CAN'T SEND YOU A PM).**

* * *

Kijin looked up from reading Reishin's plan.  
"I agree with the general idea, but is the semen necessary?"

"Absolutely. We need a strong reaction from Shuei."

"Alright. Yours? Do I carry it there in a bottle?"

"Don't be ridiculous. Pouring it from a bottle will look too staged. You will be present, _you _do the necessary. Don't look like that, Kijin, Koyu will be out by then."

"You owe me big time for this, Dumpling."  
Kijin picked up the small packet of drugs from the table, tied the black cloth over his face, and leapt out of the window.

* * *

The bruise was starting to show, purple and hideous against Koyu's fair skin. The lips were already swollen, distorting the much loved features. Shuei's hands trembled as he lifted Koyu's head. He cursed when he saw the unmistakable spray of semen covering Koyu's face. Shuei pulled the sheets off the bed and wrapped the naked Koyu in it. He lifted the unconscious form and made his way to the bathroom.

Shuei knew his way well, even in the unlighted corridors. After he disappeared, Koyu had bought over what used to be the Ran Manor when Shuei's lease on it expired. He also kept all the servants. The room he found Koyu in was one near the back entrance of the manor. Reishin had told him that was the room Koyu used when he brought back men off the streets. Reishin also told him that _their _bedroom was left intact, even though Koyu didn't sleep in it anymore. He allowed no one to touch the things in the room, and did the cleaning himself.

Koyu stirred just as Shuei lowered him into the bath. He woke up fully when his body touched the water. He stared at Shuei. His body jerked when the recognition hit. He caught Shuei's arm that was sliding out of the bathtub.

"Shuei, Shuei, don't go, please, please, I'm sorry, please, I love you Shuei, don't go, I can't have sex with you, maybe never, but I love you, please stay, I need you, I can't make it without you, Shuei, I love you, Shuei . . . "

Shuei caught Koyu's face and turned it towards the lamp. The eyes were unnaturally dilated. He lifted Koyu's wrist, and placed his fingers on it. The pulse was irregular.  
_Damn! What did he take? Should I get a physician?_

Shuei tried to extricate his arm to call for a servant, but that started a new round of frenzied pleading from Koyu. Using his free hand, Shuei stroked Koyu's forehead, making soothing sounds. Koyu pressed his forehead into Shuei's palm. Shuei moved his palm down to cup Koyu's cheek, and felt the hot tears on his hand.  
"It's alright, Koyu, I'll never leave you, I promise."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Koyu opened his eyes.  
_This ceiling … why am I here?  
Why is my face hurting?_

Koyu felt his swollen lips with his hand. The last thing he remembered was leaving the manor for the streets. He turned to his side and propped himself up.  
_Who's that sleeping on the floor, next to the bed?  
_"Shu … ei !"

Shuei rubbed the sleep from his eyes, and smiled at Koyu. He reached for Koyu's hand, took it in his, but continued to sit on the floor next to the bed. He brought Koyu's hand to his lips, kissed the palm, and grinned sheepishly.  
"Sorry, I can't get into bed with you yet, not until I figure out what to do about this no-sex thing."

Koyu stared at the grinning Shuei. _His_ Shuei.

"I'm home, Koyu."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The comb paused, in mid stroke. Shuei turned to look at Koyu kneeling behind him. Koyu had a far away look.  
"What's wrong, Koyu?"

"Do you remember our first morning? When you tied on a blue ribbon?"

Shuei twisted his body around and slipped an arm round Koyu's waist. He felt a slight tremble in Koyu.  
"Of course I do. You turned pale and hissed at me to take it off. Then you turned red and apologized, and said you had no idea what that was about."

"And you stopped wearing blue ribbons ever since."  
Koyu ran his fingers through the silky dark violet hair, lovingly, sadly.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Koyu looked into the distance, his pale grey eyes reflecting the evening glow. He sighed, and said, barely above a whisper,  
"It's my mother's birthday tomorrow."

Shuei, sitting next to Koyu on the veranda steps, put his arm round Koyu's shoulder and drew him nearer. This wordless gesture brought comfort to Koyu, but it also brought forth his tears. Shuei glanced at Koyu. There's something different about these tears. Quiet tears. Not like before, when every thought or mention of his mother would end in wrecking sobs. Shuei wondered if it was time.

Wiping Koyu's tears with the edge of his sleeve, Shuei asked quietly,  
"Koyu, can we talk about the day you ran away?"

"Shuei . . . "  
Koyu demurred at the idea of thinking about this matter. He fidgeted.

Shuei drew Koyu closer, swept aside his aqua bangs, and kissed him on the forehead.  
"It's alright, Koyu. Never mind."

Koyu pressed his face into Shuei's neck.  
"What do you want to know, Shuei?"

Shuei was happily surprised. This was the first time Koyu had agreed to talk about this topic. Koyu's memory of the first eight years of his life was still not complete. He had described it once as looking through a carved screen.  
"Tell me about the first thing you remember after you lost your memory. I know you've said it before. There's something that bothers me, but I can't put my finger on it."

Shuei listened as Koyu related waking up in a haystack on a wagon, not knowing who or where he was, and being told by the driver that he had asked for a ride to the next town.

"Koyu, the wagon was going in the wrong direction!"

"Huh?"

"The wagon was going _towards _your hometown, not away from it."

Koyu raised his head from Shuei's neck. His large eyes stared at Shuei.  
"Shuei . . . "

"You turned back, Koyu."

Shuei watched Koyu's face as the realization sank in. It was the most beautiful sight.

Then Koyu leaned in. Shuei turned his face away. Koyu stopped short, flushed, apologized, and started pulling away from Shuei. Shuei muttered a curse, pulled Koyu back, and kissed him. The kiss deepened. Shuei started to feel the pressure. Anytime soon, it would turn to pain. With a groan, Shuei broke off the kiss, and pushed Koyu away.

"I'm so sorry, Shuei, I'll go get the key."  
Koyu jumped up.

Shuei reached out a hand and pulled him back down onto the veranda steps.  
"Stay, Koyu. It will pass. Just don't touch me. Not for a while."

Koyu sat down on the steps, a safe distance from Shuei. He looked ahead, not wanting to embarrass Shuei by watching him struggle. Shuei has changed in just these short weeks. His initial solution to the "no-sex thing" was to wear himself out at Koga House. It worked, mostly. But Shuei was not happy because he was necessarily exhausted by the time he got into bed with Koyu, and fell asleep almost immediately, and couldn't enjoy what they both loved, just lying together in bed, sometimes talking, sometimes just snuggling, happy in a compatible silence.

And so Shuei approached His Highness. He had remembered Ryuki mentioning once that he had collections of strange things, like four hundred and twenty one uniquely designed thimbles, more than two thousand chopstick rests in jade, porcelain, wood, and even resin, and, more to the point, seventy three models of chastity belts, for both sexes. Ryuki was horrified at the suggestion, but finally allowed Shuei to select one.

Shuei was happier with this second solution. They could lie in bed, and they didn't have to hold back on embracing, nuzzling, touching each other. The one thing he didn't allow was kissing, because it usually ended up, well, like it just did.

Initially, when that happened, Koyu would hand Shuei the key, and disappear. But lately, Shuei preferred to just let it "pass". Just like the Koga House issue. Koyu began to notice that Shuei was no longer asking for the prisoner, as he calls it, to be released for R&R. So much so that the situation became quite bizarre – Koyu started hounding Shuei to visit Koga House, until Shuei lost his temper.

Koyu felt Shuei's hand on his.  
_Ah, it has passed.  
_He turned, just as Shuei threw his other hand over his shoulder, drawing him closer.

"So, Koyu, what do you want to do for your mother's birthday tomorrow?"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Koyu rolled over in his sleep. Shuei's body jerked. The movement woke Koyu up.  
"mmm . . . Shuei?"

Koyu snapped awake at the sound of Shuei's gasping breath. He rolled off Shuei quickly, taking his weight off Shuei's chastity belt.  
"Oh my god, Shuei, I'm so sorry!"

"It's alright. It's a good thing you are as light as you are."

Shuei looked at Koyu, in his white undershirt and pants. He still hasn't quite gotten used to the sight. They both slept in shirts and pants these days.  
_Was it really that long ago that we slept in the nude together?_

Shuei patted the mattress next to himself. Koyu took the invitation, and cuddled up next to Shuei. Shuei tucked an arm under Koyu, holding him close.  
_It still feels strange, all this silk between us. It's going to be this way, maybe for always._

"Koyu, do you remember what we talked about in the army camp that day when Bijin painted the mural? I feel ready now, what about you?"

Koyu twisted his head around to look at Shuei's profile.  
"Shuei . . . are you sure? You want a kid now? We are not totally together yet. I mean, we are not even having sex._"_

"Koyu, even if we have sex every minute of the day, we are still not going to beget any children."

Koyu laughed.

_He's LAUGHING! I haven't heard Koyu laugh since this whole thing started!  
_Shuei laughed too, in relief.  
"So, Koyu, are you ready to become a father?"

"But, Shuei, the chastity belt . . ."

"What _about _it? I can still be a perfectly good father with a chastity belt on! Without actually doing the fathering, of course. That, dear one, is _your _job anyway, didn't we already agree on that?"

Koyu snuggled against Shuei.  
"I'll think about it seriously."_

* * *

_

Yuki drew his thighs together with a grimace.  
_A chastity belt! Oh, poor Shuei!_

He continued reading Reishin's letter, chuckling._  
"_Imprisonment for the charge of murder – that's getting off easy"_  
It's good to see that Shuei's humour is still intact!_

He nodded in satisfaction on reading about Koyu finding peace when, with Shuei's help, he realized that after he ran away, he changed his mind and turned back to go home.

He laughed out loud at Reishin's exasperated post-script.  
"Stop talking about my beautiful hands, or else!"

Setsuna took out a piece of paper and wrote his very short reply to Reishin.  
"We are ready to receive Shuei and Koyu. Send them here anytime!  
P.S. Or else what, Lord Reishin? Will you report me to your man?"

He sealed his letter and set it aside. His hand strayed to Reishin's letter, hesitated, then picked up the rose-scented paper.

* * *

The carriage was actually very roomy, and the seats were the best there were in the industry. But, Koyu noted, one could be forgiven for thinking otherwise, looking at the way his two travelling companions were fidgeting.

Shuei's nervousness was easily understood. He would be meeting the woman who lost her child as a direct consequence of sex with him. Reishin's agitation was a mystery to Koyu. In fact, Reishin's presence on this trip to the Ran province was altogether incomprehensible. At the last minute, as the carriage was being loaded with their luggage, Reishin had impulsively decided to tag along. Reishin, who was known to spend weeks selecting the items to bring on a three-day trip, then threw together his stuff for a nine-day trip in half an hour.

Koyu leaned back against the upholstery, closing his eyes, shutting out the visuals of his restless companions. He wondered what Lord Reishin was up to. He shrugged philosophically. When the time came, he would then know.

* * *

Shuei looked at his sister-in-law, for the first time. He never knew of her existence. Officially, his elder brother Setsuna had only one wife. And due to the stipulation that the triplets must share a bedroom, as part of the game to keep them indistinguishable from each other, Gyokuka, the official wife, had a separate room. The Setsuna that's in love with her visited her there, but he was not allowed to spend the night, he would return to the bedroom he shared with his brothers after his trysts. Shuei was just told that Koyu's mother had her room in the servants' quarters. She was officially a servant. And the Setsuna that loves _her _does the same as the other brother.

She looked exactly the same. Shuei remembered her well. She was very beautiful. More than that, her desire was so evident, her need so desperate, in her eyes, even in her bloated, awkward pregnant body.

No, she didn't look the same. Just as beautiful, yes. But no longer needy. She looked radiant, and content. Almost like a different person, in fact. Seated, she smiled at him, holding out her hands in welcome.

Shuei fell to his knees, holding both her hands to his face.  
"Forgive me."

"Don't, Shuei. I have nothing to forgive you for, just like I have nothing to thank you for."

That took Shuei by surprise. He looked up into gentle sky-blue eyes.

"Do you know how unhappy I was then, Shuei? I was made a wealthy man's concubine at a young age. I had not known any tenderness. When you broke my fall and helped me to my feet, it was your gentleness that impressed me. And when, out of impulse, I threw my arms around you and pressed my lips against yours, and you responded, I knew I _had _to have you. Shuei, I seduced you. I knew the risk. Your only fault, if at all, was being a great kisser. By the time we drew apart, I was no longer thinking rationally."

She withdrew her hands from Shuei's, and held his hands in hers instead.  
"Now, I am so happy, I can still hardly believe it. Shuei, we had sex, I miscarried, was thrown out, ended up in the brothel, met Setsuna. It is all a chain of events, all cause and effect. Do I then thank you for all this good fortune that came out of this, and in the same way, do I blame you for the miscarriage?"

She paused.  
"I can neither thank you nor blame you. The events that happened in my life as a result of our having sex, has got nothing to do with you. So, you see, Shuei, don't ask me to forgive you."  
She smiled at him reassuringly.  
"Now get up please, I need to speak to Koyu."

Speak wasn't exactly what she did. She threw herself at Koyu. Shuei was surprised at Koyu's response. Koyu, who was always uptight and uncomfortable about being touched by anyone, embraced his mother warmly.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Shuei led Koyu into the bedroom of his childhood. They sat down in silence, both preoccupied with their own thoughts.

Shuei stared at the blue ribbon in his hand. She had kept it all these years. Not because of sentimental attachment. Not because he was a great lover. But in anticipation of the day when, possibly, her young once-off lover would discover that he had caused her miscarriage. She kept the ribbon as a concrete, solid token, to show him that she bore no grudge.

His mother's words to Shuei were running through Koyu's mind.  
_"The events that happened in my life as a result of our having sex, has got nothing to do with you."_

Koyu flushed. In telling Shuei he can't accept his murder weapon, Koyu was transferring the burden of his own guilt to Shuei. The chastity belt, besides being a physical torment, was also a constant reminder to Shuei of the miscarriage and the subsequent death of Koyu's mother.  
_Oh_, _Shuei! How can I do this to you?  
_Even after knowing that Koyu's mother was alive, that still didn't change the fact of the miscarriage. Koyu realized that he's got to get over his squeamishness.  
_I've got to apply my mother's logical reasoning to Shuei's penis!_

Koyu stood up and walked around the table. He pulled out the pin that held Shuei's headpiece in place. He removed the gold and blue headpiece. He undid Shuei's topknot, shaking the long hair loose, running his fingers through it to comb it out. He reached across Shuei's shoulder and picked up the blue ribbon from Shuei's hand. He gathered Shuei's hair, about two-third-way down, and tied the blue ribbon on.

Walking around to face Shuei, Koyu reached into his pants pocket and took out a small key.  
"It's time to release the prisoner, Shuei."

**[The End]**

**

* * *

**

Notes:

**The discussion between Shuei and Koyu on having children is a reference to the events in my fanfic The General's Man. In brief, it was tacitly agreed that they do want children in the future, and that Koyu would father the children (with a woman, of course! ^_^).**


	4. Remembrance

**Title : ****Blue Ribbon IV (Remembrance)**

**Disclaimer :** **I don't own Saiunkoku Monogatari. It belongs to Sai Yukino.**

**Rating : ****T for theme only**

**Genre : ****Angst**

**Warnings : ****Yaoi, mentions of**

**Pairing :** **None**

**Summary :** **Reishin makes a third trip to the Ran province after a nightmare.**

**Notes : ****This was written in response to the LJ Saiun_Challenge prompt "Remembrance".**

**PLEASE REVIEW. EVEN IF YOU ARE NOT A MEMBER, I APPRECIATE YOUR NOT-LOGGED-IN COMMENTS (MY RESPONSE WILL BE ON THE REVIEW PAGE IF I CAN'T SEND YOU A PM).**

* * *

"Reiiiii-shiiiiin!"

Reishin sat bolt upright in bed. He touched his brow. It was covered in sweat.  
_Who was it? Who called out to me? I know that voice!  
Ran Setsuna! Which one?_

"Dumpling? What is it?"  
Kijin's sleep-laden voice asked, as he turned and placed a hand on Reishin.  
"Why are you trembling?"  
His voice sharpened. He sat up and put an arm round Reishin.

* * *

[Three days later]

The door opened and a servant announced Master Setsuna. Reishin tensed. He had not seen Setsuna since that time when he accompanied Koyu and Shuei here to meet Koyu's mother, when he surprised Koyu and Shuei by returning to Kyo ahead of schedule, and alone. Koyu and Shuei's return to Kyo was delayed by the accident. Koyu was standing next to a column when it collapsed. Koyu would have been hurt if Setsuna had not pushed him away. When Koyu and Shuei finally returned to Kyo, they brought with them a letter from Setsuna. It was only one sentence,  
"Lord Reishin, I'm healing well. Your Setsuna."

_Your _Setsuna.

**[Flashback]**

**Reishin was left in the main hall while Koyu and Shuei went to meet Koyu's mother. When they arrived at the manor, they were greeted by two Setsunas, not three. Reishin had looked for **_**him **_**among the two Setsunas, and found no signs. Reishin felt empty. Irritated by this irrational disappointment, Reishin paced the hall.**

**Reishin turned around at the sound of a soft gasp.  
"It's you, isn't it?"**

**A soft smile spread across Yuki's face. Slightly lopsided, a secret smile.  
"Yes, Lord Reishin."**

"**Do you have any other name?"**

"**No, all three of us were given the name Setsuna. We, of course, call each other by something else, but that's just randomly picked up."**

"**So how shall I know you?"**

**Yuki thought about it. He grinned.  
"Well, you are able to pick me out, so how about YOUR Setsuna?"**

**Reishin felt the heat on his face. He looked at the man facing him and said softly.  
"My Setsuna."**

**Reishin watched as his Setsuna 's violet eyes darkened.**

Setsuna walked in. Reishin scrutinized his every detail.  
_He looks different, more reserved. I guess that's expected, given what transpired on my last trip here. He looks well. Just barely over a month. His body heals fast. No sign of pain or even discomfort in his gait._

Reishin rose from his chair to greet Setsuna.  
"I am glad to see that you look so well. Thank you again for saving Koyu."

The violet eyes were shuttered, distant.  
"Lord Reishin, you have already thanked me in your letter. There is no need to repeat yourself. Why have you come?"

Reishin couldn't very well say it was because he had a nightmare in which a Ran triplet called out to him. And there was that other thing – this man standing in front of him didn't feel like _his_ Setsuna. Granted that the last thing Reishin did, knee Setsuna in the groin, would make the next time they meet awkward. But even so, this triplet's coolness was too real. Reishin couldn't sense any awkwardness or embarrassment in the man.  
_Did Setsuna get one of his brothers to stand in for him? That must be it. Injuries like that can't possibly heal so fast. _

"I don't know which one you are, but you are not the one I wrote to. I came to speak to that Setsuna. Please take me to him."

The violet eyes looked at Reishin for a long moment. He took a letter from his sleeve and placed it on the table.  
"My brother anticipated that you couldn't be tricked. He died three nights ago."  
He inclined his head, turned and left the room.

"Reishin. I figure I can call you just 'Reishin', since I am now dead.

The injuries didn't kill me immediately, but my organs were fatally damaged, and the physicians gave me a few weeks at the most. My brothers and I decided that, in the best interests of the Ran clan, I should remain undead. I trust that you will keep our secret, for Koyu's sake, if nothing else.

I can only anticipate the circumstances that will make it necessary for my brothers to hand you this letter.

Did you come to thank me in person?  
That is generous of you, after my transgression. It is a pity I'm already dead. I would have loved to see you again. You don't need to keep thanking me, Reishin. Koyu's younger, got a lot more going in his life, and his death would have destroyed Shuei. But the truth of the matter is, at the point when I pushed Koyu from under the falling column, my only thought was to save Koyu for you.

You can take that any way you like. As payment for forcing myself on you, or because I love you. There. I've finally said it. It's good to be dead, I wouldn't have the courage to say that otherwise.

Reishin. You have always been just 'Reishin' in my thoughts. You, Reishin, have turned my comfortable life on its head. After that meeting when I held your hands (sorry!), I finally faced up to the truth about how I felt for you.

Reishin, when you arrived, unannounced, with Shuei and Koyu, I was not prepared. I was not expecting you. I came home to find you, alone, in the main hall. You were so warm and open. After weeks of longing for you, I _wanted _to believe that you came for me. I am so sorry, Reishin, my loneliness and need for you clouded my thinking processes. I must have misread the whole situation, imagined cues where none existed. There was no way that you came for me. As the whole of Saiunkoku knows, you are very much in love with Lord Kijin.

I'm embarrassed to be telling you this, because I don't suppose it matters to you. But it does mean a lot to me that you should know that Gyokuka is not MY wife, and neither is Koyu's mother. They are the wives of the other two Setsunas.

I apologize for forcing myself on you. I apologize for not apologizing while I was still alive. I have recently discovered many new things about myself, all unpleasant. One is cowardice, the other, of course, is being capable of rape. Well, attempted rape anyway. You were awesome, Reishin, as awesome as the bruising you gave me.

Your letter thanked me profusely, but made no mention of what transpired in the main hall that day. But I know you will forgive me eventually. So do not feel any guilt on account of this, Reishin.

Now, for the shameless request. The blue ribbon binding this letter is one of mine. All the Ran siblings wear blue ribbons in the hair. Will you keep it, and me, in remembrance, Reishin, please?"

* * *

The smell of the freshly turned soil still lingered in the air. The grave was unmarked, as Setsuna was officially still alive. The patch of ground was raw, devoid of cover, and in the centre stood a transplanted rose bush. There were no blooms, the leaves trimmed to a minimum to reduce stress on the plant during the transplant. Reishin was told the roses will be pale pink. Setsuna had wanted that, because Reishin smelt of roses, and made him think of pastel pink blooms.

Reishin looked at the blue ribbon in his hands.  
_I did come for you, my Setsuna. I know that now. _

**[The End]**


	5. Love Song

**Title : ****Blue Ribbon V (Love Song)**

**Disclaimer :** **I don't own Saiunkoku Monogatari. It belongs to Sai Yukino.**

**Rating : ****T for theme only**

**Genre : ****Angst/Friendship/Humour**

**Warnings : ****Yaoi, mentions of**

**Pairing :** **Reishin/Kijin, Reishin/Setsuna**

**Summary :** **Reishin confesses to Kijin that he has feelings for Setsuna.**

**Notes** : **This was written in response to the LJ Saiun_challenge prompt "Love Song"**

**PLEASE REVIEW. EVEN IF YOU ARE NOT A MEMBER, I APPRECIATE YOUR NOT-LOGGED-IN COMMENTS (MY RESPONSE WILL BE ON THE REVIEW PAGE IF I CAN'T SEND YOU A PM).**

* * *

Reishin wrung his hands, and waited. He stared at his own hands, at the blue ribbon twined around his fingers. He could hear his own agitated breathing, his own heart pounding, and not much else. Not daring to look at Kijin, Reishin had no idea how Kijin was taking his confession.

The last two days had been torture. Reishin wasn't sure which was the greater pain, the need to come clean, or the need to mourn Setsuna. All he knew was that he was in torment, and he couldn't cry openly for fear that Kijin would suspect something was amiss. Reishin was very aware that Kijin had been subdued since Reishin's return from Ran province. He had asked no questions before or after the trip. He had also asked no questions when Reishin, in the middle of dinner, had to stop eating to wipe away silent tears.

Reishin heard the rustle of Kijin's silk robes. Kijin had stood up from the stool. Reishin looked up in surprise. Kijin walked over to the carved screen, and picked up the niku that was leaning against it. Around two weeks ago, when Kijin had returned from his trip, he took his niku out of storage and put it in their bedroom. When asked if he was going to resume playing it, he had given the non-committal "maybe". Kijin came back to his stool, sat down, adjusted his position, and placed the niku on his thigh.

"Kijin, what are you doing?"  
Reishin asked, at a loss as to how to take this strange reaction to his confession.

"I'm going to sing you a love song."  
Kijin smiled at Reishin's expression.  
"Just listen, Dumpling, before you ask any questions."

Reishin watched in dumbfounded silence as Kijin tuned the instrument. Kijin hadn't played the niku for a very long time. He played it beautifully, and he sang even more beautifully. But he had a strange quirk – he refused to sing any other person's songs. AND he refused to write any song lyrics. Reishin will never forget the first time Kijin played the niku and sang for him. They were memorizing the Four Classics and Reishin, as with almost all scholars, was stuck in what all students term "The Devil's Passage", so named because it was particularly difficult to commit to memory. Kijin disappeared and came back with a niku. He played the instrument and _sang _the Devil's Passage. After the third repetition, Reishin got every word of the passage down pat.

Thereafter, whenever Reishin clamoured for Kijin's singing, Kijin would either sing the Devil's Passage, or, he would pick up any book, or any paper with writing on it, and sing the words written. The most hysterical being a recipe for stir-fried lean pork with bamboo shoots, sung in Kijin's beautiful, lilting voice.  
_And now he's going to sing a song?  
No, no, that's not the point! Kijin's going to sing a love song after I told him that I do reciprocate Setsuna's feelings, THAT'S the point!_

Kijin started singing.

"This one, this man of yours who now sings,  
the same man who calls you 'My Dumpling',  
he came to me while I lay dying,  
and he told me about your feelings."

Reishin gasped, and opened his mouth to speak.

Kijin shook his head at Reishin, without breaking from the melody.

**[Flashback]**

"**Lord Kijin, do you run around Saiunkoku checking out every man that lusts after Reishin?"  
The mockery in the violet eyes was self-directed.**

**Those eyes, they were the only things alive in that face. Kijin, who had just seen Setsuna's brothers, felt an inexplicable sadness looking at the wasted face. Kijin hazarded a guess.  
"No, only those that force themselves on him."**

**The violet eyes darkened with pain. Yuki closed his eyes and asked quietly.  
"Is Reishin alright?"**

"**No, he's not. He's distracted. He flushes for no apparent reason. He cries when he thinks I'm not looking. He masturbates."**

**Yuki's eyes flew open.**

"**Reishin's fretting for you, Setsuna. But I'm not sure if he even realizes it himself. He came to Ran province on impulse. He decided on it half an hour before Koyu and Shuei were scheduled to leave. The only reason was to see you. So what happened? What did you do to make Reishin flee?"**

"**I . . . I can't talk about it."**

**Kijin grunted.  
"Well, it doesn't matter. I came to look for you because I didn't believe the word you put out that you were healing well. I came to tell you that Reishin reciprocates your feelings."**

"**Why, Lord Kijin?"**

"**Firstly, so that you can die in peace. Secondly, so that, in the event that Reishin finds out that you are actually dead, I can tell him that you knew how he felt. That might go some way in comforting him."**

**The violet eyes overflowed with tears.**

Kijin continued to sing.

"Your Kijin, he instinctively knew,  
what's best for me, and also for you.  
He saw my point, and he took my cue,  
and he let the white lie continue. "

**[Flashback]**

"**But that needn't happen at all, Setsuna. If I bring Reishin here, the two of you can sort things out, there's still time. Your brothers say the physicians expect you to live another two weeks."**

"**No, Lord Kijin. It's better if Reishin thinks I'm alive. That's not to say that I'm not grateful to you for letting me know about how Reishin feels, at least I don't feel like a fool! But, Kijin . . . can I call you Kijin?"  
Yuki smiled weakly.**

**Kijin nodded.**

"**But, Kijin, what Reishin feels now will eventually pass. After all, it's not like we live in the same city and see each other constantly. Things will fall back to their natural order with time. And Reishin will be left unscarred. For Reishin to know that I'm dying as a result of saving Koyu will put a guilt trip on him that will be difficult to disperse. What I'm trying to say, Kijin, is that it's best to let the white lie continue. But, in the event that Reishin does find out, then as you so wisely pointed out, your telling me how he feels is of utmost importance. At least Reishin wouldn't have to contend with the guilt that always arises when someone dies. He wouldn't have to regret that he never had a chance to let me know that he reciprocated my feelings."**

**Yuki paused.  
"Are you in a hurry to return to Kyo? Can you stay a few days?"**

"**I can. But why?"**

**Yuki smiled ruefully.  
"Dying is boring, Kijin! I have already handed over all the official matters to my brothers. There's nothing for me to do except wait to die. I'm still lucid, and when the painkillers do their work and I'm in manageable pain, I'm bored. I've never had so much free time in my life, and it's driving me crazy. My brothers are poor company. They can't get past the fact that I'm dying, and can't behave normally around me. You, Kijin, are different, you don't tiptoe around me. And of course, I really want to know more about Reishin, and would love to hear you talk about him. Please?"  
**

Reishin saw a slight smile on Kijin's face as he sang the third stanza.

"Your man, Ko Kijin, who's now my pal,  
he lifted me, my brothers as well,  
from a gloom that we could not dispel,  
with stories that only he can tell.

Singing Devil's Passage made us laugh,  
as all scholars would who know their stuff.  
My brothers, to watch me die was tough,  
to see me laugh was comfort enough.

In private, your man told me the games,  
the things you do, and set me aflame!  
He stoked me, teased me, until I came,  
Coaxing me to scream, to shout your name.

**[Flashback]**

"**You try not to? WHY? What's wrong with fantasizing about Reishin?"**

"**It's not right, Kijin, without permission."**

"_**Permission**_**? Which part of Saiunkoku did you crawl out from?"  
Kijin took a deep breath.  
"Fantasizing about someone is harmless. The person doesn't know about it. No one is hurt."**

"**By that logic, do you mean watching someone undress without that person knowing is harmless? Or to take it further, touching someone when that person is unconscious is acceptable? The person is not hurt, the person is unaware, so that makes it alright?"**

**Kijin was stumped. Finally, he said,  
"Granted. I have no response. If I think of a counter argument before you die, I will send you a letter."**

**Yuki laughed.  
"I'll wait as long as I can."**

"**But, Setsuna, isn't it different now? You know that Reishin desires you too, is that not equal to permission?" **

**Yuki gave it some thought.  
"I guess so."**

"**Am I relieved! At least I didn't bring it for nothing!"  
Kijin went to his luggage, and took out a white silk undershirt. He handed the shirt to Yuki.  
"Reishin's."**

**Yuki buried his face in it. He spoke through Reishin's shirt.  
"Thank you, Kijin. This is a wonderful gift. But I think it's too late for me, I mean, for the use you have in mind."**

**Kijin felt a constriction in his chest.  
"No. I'll help you."**

**Yuki lifted his face from the shirt. He looked at Kijin, half amused, half puzzled.  
"Help me? I'm not even sure I **_**want**_** your help, never mind the how of it!"**

**Kijin sat on the bed, and reached towards Setsuna.**

"**What on earth? Don't you **_**dare **_**touch me! You can't DO this to a paraplegic!"**

"**Calm down. I won't touch you, not that way. I'm just getting you into position. Like this."  
Kijin rolled Yuki on his side, facing the wall. He lifted Yuki's head, and slid Reishin's shirt beneath it. He got into bed, and lay down behind Yuki.**

"**KIJIN!"**

"**Shut up. I'm just going to support your body. More importantly, I'm going to tell you all about Reishin, what he feels like, what he tastes like, what he likes, how he likes it, where he likes it, the games he likes to play."  
Kijin moved closer, and whispered into Yuki's ear.**

"Your man, he helped me to find release.  
He lent me his precious memories.  
I asked on the day he was to leave,  
'Tell me how to thank you, Kijin, please.'

He said, voice aquiver, his tone dry,  
'I've seen you laugh, seen what makes you cry,  
I've also seen what caught Reishin's eye.  
How to thank me? Just make sure you die!'

He's really awesome, your Ko Kijin.  
He and I, we did this on a whim.  
Written by me, and now sung by him,  
a song from the men who love Reishin."

Kijin put down the niku. He smiled at Reishin and held his arms open. Reishin stumbled into Kijin's embrace.

"Setsuna told me that, before I arrived, he had already written a letter to you, in his brothers' safekeeping, in the event that you do find out he's dead. He said I will know you've received the letter if I see you with his blue ribbon. And he asked me to tell you that he had lived with the shadow of death all his life so dying is no big deal for him."

**[Flashback]**

"**So you mean to say that, in the event that someone is able to tell you apart, your two younger brothers will be killed?"**

"**Not necessarily. It's more like two will be killed, it really doesn't matter which two, I guess. Originally, the unstated understanding among the three of us was that I would be the one spared, as I'm the eldest, the official Setsuna. But when my brother fell in love with Gyokuka, and was tormented because he hasn't even got his own **_**life **_**to offer the woman he loves, I changed the rules. I told him I would die in his stead because he has got someone who loves him. So Gyokuka became officially Ran Setsuna's wife, that is, the wife of the eldest triplet."**

**Kijin interrupted.  
"But, what about the other brother? He's loved by Koyu's mother."**

**Yuki sighed.  
"I know. It sucks, doesn't it? I guess they will have to draw lots or something."  
He paused.  
"That's why I have no regrets, I mean, about Reishin. Sometimes I forget my situation and wished that I had met Reishin as an adult before you knew him, you know, that type of unproductive, useless regrets. But really, I have nothing to offer Reishin or anyone else."  
He smiled at Kijin.  
"Can you tell Reishin that for me? That I was prepared to be killed from the moment my brother fell in love. If you think about it that way, I've had extra time. And most importantly, I had a chance to fall in love."**

Kijin fell silent. He continued to hold Reishin.

"Kijin, do you think Setsuna's soul will go on?"  
Reishin spoke into Kijin's chest.

"Maybe not for a while yet, he's too attached. Which is why I told him he's welcome to share my body, that is, when we're making out."

Reishin looked up at Kijin, speechless.

"Of course, I also told him that's only if _you _say it's alright. You know how sticky Setsuna is about permission."

"How do I give permission?"

Kijin pulled out the blue ribbon that was still twined around Reishin's fingers. He grinned.  
"Wear this in your hair."

Reishin touched his fingers to the ribbon. Smiling, he looked into Kijin's eyes.  
"My Setsuna, if you are already in there, tie this ribbon on for me."

Kijin gathered a lock of Reishin's moss-green hair, and tied on the indigo ribbon. He then gathered Reishin's hands, brought them to his face, and kissed them in fervent worship.

**[The End]**

**

* * *

**

Notes:

**The predicament of the Ran triplets, although not given much scope in the light novels, really moved me. What must it be like to be forced to live as one person in public? It is said that Ran Setsuna has only one wife, Gyokuka. But there are three Ran Setsunas, and it is said somewhere in the light novels that they are about the same age as Reishin. It made me wonder, are the two younger Setsunas not allowed to take wives? Or perhaps they refrain from doing so, given that anytime someone can tell the triplets apart they will be killed.**

**Another thing that saddened me is the unsaid but very real threat posed by allowing anyone to get close to them. To let anyone know them better is to risk exposure. As such, they must have no close friends. Although they have each other, it is still sad. In this fic, though it's not actually said, the implication is that Kijin is the only friend in Yuki's (and to some extent also Tsuki and Hana's) life.**


	6. Fireflies

**Title : ****Blue Ribbon VI (Fireflies)**

**Disclaimer :**** I don't own Saiunkoku Monogatari. It belongs to Sai Yukino.**

**Rating : ****T for theme only**

**Genre : ****Friendship/Family**

**Warnings : ****Yaoi, mentions of**

**Pairing :** **Reishin/Kijin, Reishin/Setsuna**

**Notes :  
****  
1) ****This part picks up exactly where part V left off.**  
**2)**** This was written in response to the LJ Saiun_challenge prompt "Fireflies".**

**PLEASE REVIEW. EVEN IF YOU ARE NOT A MEMBER, I APPRECIATE YOUR NOT-LOGGED-IN COMMENTS (MY RESPONSE WILL BE ON THE REVIEW PAGE IF I CAN'T SEND YOU A PM).**

_

* * *

_

Oi, Setsuna, can we get ON with it? How long do you plan on kissing Reishin's hands?

_Hmmph? Oh, sorry. What do I do next?_

_Why are you asking me that? I gave you the reins for tonight, didn't I? I'm just coming along for the ride. OH! I'm a backseat driver, aren't I? Right, I'll shut up._

_No, wait, Kijin . . ._

_. . . . . . ._

_KIJIN! Answer me!_

_What?_

_You drive. I botched it that time and freaked Reishin out. I don't know what to do._

_You've got to learn sometime._

_No, I don't. I'm dead._

_Really. What's that going on between your legs?_

_YOUR legs. _

_No way. I've never gotten so far just from kissing Reishin's hands. It's you.  
__Do something, Setsuna. Reishin's looking at us strangely. I think he's going to take matters into his own hands._

_What's he going to . . . ooOOH . . . my . . . GOD!_

* * *

The two heads were pressed together, their blue ribbons touching, reading from Kijin's letter. They read at the same speed, laughed in unison, and when they finally parted and put down the letter, both faces were smiling through tears.

"So our big brother has finally been initiated into sex!"

"AFTER death, no less!"  
Hana shook his head in amazement.

"Kijin said Brother Yuki will leave with the fireflies. So, do we have anything to ask or tell him?"

"No. There's nothing left unsettled. Except to thank him, of course."

"Yes. We'll write the letter after we seal our pact. I'll go get the knife."

While waiting for Tsuki to return, Hana looked out of the study window. The first fireflies of summer had already started to gather.

The two remaining Ran Setsunas sat opposite each other, across the table. They undid the blue ribbons from their hair and placed them on the table. Tsuki picked up the knife and cut into his left palm. He handed the knife to Hana, who did the same. They each picked up their own blue ribbon and placed it along the cut on their palm. Their hands clasped, their blood mixing and soaking into the blue ribbons. A blood oath.

With their left palms bandaged, the brothers wrote the letter to Kijin. They wrote to thank Kijin and Yuki for giving them comfort, and also hope. They wrote of the blood pact they just made, that the one who outlives the other will regularly lend his body to his brother, for as long as his sister-in-law lives. They sealed the letter. They smiled at each other and picked up the blood-stained blue ribbons, the tokens of their oath.

* * *

Reishin sighed in his sleep, half-smiling, and rolled onto his back. His features relaxed again, into a beautiful serenity. Tracing along his jaw line and neck, his dark moss-green hair, darkened to almost black, was plastered in strands against his sweaty skin. A light summer breeze from the open window touched him, and he shuddered, arching his neck.

Kijin/Yuki sighed, besotted.

_He's really beautiful, isn't he?_

_Hnn. I never tire of watching him sleep, not even after all these years. He seems like a different person._

_Yes, without all his outward prickliness._

A lone firefly flew in from the open window, dancing in the semi-darkness of the room. The fireflies are getting fewer everyday.

_Setsuna . . ._

_I'm ready, Kijin, I can't stay forever._

_You'll leave while Reishin's sleeping? Without saying goodbye?_

_There's no need to. He knows I'll leave with the fireflies._

Yuki reached out with Kijin's hand and brushed across Reishin's cheek, stopping to rest lightly on the blue ribbon at Reishin's temple.

_He won't need to wear this anymore. Goodbye, Kijin. Thank you for everything._

**[The End]**

**

* * *

**

Notes:

**I've read many websites on the symbolism behind fireflies in the Japanese culture. Some say fireflies are the souls of the departed, some say of departed warriors. And it's been a metaphor to symbolize passionate love in poetry since the 8****th**** century. The beetles spend nine months as larvae, but survive for barely a fortnight as adults. The brevity of their existence and their flickering light has made them a symbol of the transience and the poignancy of life. **


	7. New Growth

**Title : ****Blue Ribbon VII (New Growth)**

**Disclaimer :** **I don't own Saiunkoku Monogatari. It belongs to Sai Yukino.**

**Rating : ****T for theme only**

**Genre : ****Family**

**Warnings : ****Yaoi, mentions of**

**Pairing :** **Koyu/Shuei**

**Summary : ****Koyu and Shuei, in trying to become parents, end up having to deal with other issues in their relationship. Hana comes to Kyo with three gifts.**

**Notes : ****This was written in response to the LJ Saiun_Challenge prompt "New Growth".**

**PLEASE REVIEW. EVEN IF YOU ARE NOT A MEMBER, I APPRECIATE YOUR NOT-LOGGED-IN COMMENTS (MY RESPONSE WILL BE ON THE REVIEW PAGE IF I CAN'T SEND YOU A PM).**

* * *

Koyu stared at the nervous young woman seated on the bed. Without turning to look at Shuei, Koyu asked,  
"How old is she?"

Koyu's voice was quiet. Too quiet. But Shuei, in his excitement at having found the perfect candidate, failed to notice it.

"Just turned fourteen."

Koyu spun around to face Shuei.  
"FOURTEEN!"

The tone was unmistakable this time. Shuei stared in bewilderment at the anger in Koyu's eyes.  
"Koyu, fourteen's the standard acceptable marriageable age for girls . . ."

"I know that! But there's no way I'm going to have sex with a fourteen-year-old child!"

"You didn't state any preferences or non-preferences, Koyu, you said to leave it to me to make the arrangements. What age did you have in mind?"

"It's not just the age, Shuei! I imagined it would be a woman who's had her own children, not a virgin!"

At the sound of a sharp intake of breath, Koyu and Shuei stopped short.

"Rin, I'm sorry. I'll talk to you later. Koyu, we'll talk in the study."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Shuei closed the doors of the study.  
"Koyu, I didn't choose her for her virginity or otherwise. I chose her because she's good looking, and also because she sounds intelligent, and feels like a nice person. I chose her for the qualities she would pass on to her child. Your child. Our child."

"That's what I don't understand, Shuei, why do you insist it has to be MY child in order for it to be OUR child? Why can't we just adopt?"

Shuei was stunned.  
"What? But I'm doing this because of you! You said that you were looking forward to the pleasure of fathering children."

"When did I say that?"

"A couple of days after His Highness started lessons. We were waiting for him at the Archives. You distinctly said 'fathering', not 'being a father'. Don't you remember?"

"I don't remember. Maybe I did. That was before we got involved, and at that point in my life I would naturally assume that I would marry a woman and father children, right?"

"Right, that's the whole point, Koyu. By being involved with me, you lost that anticipated pleasure. I wanted to give that back to you."

"Oh Shuei! Why didn't you just _say _so? I don't feel the need to father children. I just want to bring up children. I agreed to it because I thought that was what you wanted. Can you pay Rin all that is due to her, but cancel the arrangement?"

Shuei looked hesitant, and at a loss.

Koyu put a hand against the wall to steady himself.  
"Oh my god, Shuei, did you _buy _her?"

"Yes, but that doesn't mean . . . "

Koyu stormed out of the study.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Shuei knocked on the room door. Rin opened the door, eyes wide and frightened.  
"Rin, I'll settle things with Master Koyu. Go to sleep. And don't worry. Like I said to you before, even if Master Koyu doesn't want you, you can still stay."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Koyu tensed as Shuei walked into the bedroom.

"Koyu . . ."

"DON'T! I will not accept slaves, Shuei. One of the things I respect about Lord Kijin is that he doesn't own slaves."  
Koyu's voice trembled.  
"And I didn't think we would ever have to be engaged in an argument like this."

Shuei didn't respond immediately.  
"So you would prefer that I sell her back to her dealer?"

"Yes! NO! Damn you, Shuei, for putting me in this situation."

"Koyu, a slave that is treated well is no worse off than a servant. My elder brothers have both servants and slaves in the manor, and they are treated equally well."

Koyu snorted.  
"Equal? How can a human that is owned by another human ever feel equal?"

"They _are_ equal in every way. The living conditions are the same. The amount of money they receive is the same, it's just that one is called salary, and the other allowance. More importantly, my brothers' slaves are well-treated and happy."

"So. Now slaves are _happy_. Way to go, Ran Shuei."

Shuei sucked in his breath. Koyu's words can be extremely cutting.  
"Koyu, my brother _bought _your mother from the brothel owner. She's been a slave for sixteen years. And didn't you hear her tell me that she's so happy, she can hardly believe it?"

"That's different! My mother loves and is loved by your brother. She said he treats her preciously, hangs on her every word, and is tender and passionate in bed. Like YOU!"  
Koyu glared at Shuei.

Shuei didn't know how to react. Koyu's words, tone and facial expression were totally at odds with one another. There were undertones and juxtapositions of ideas that Shuei couldn't even begin to grasp. He wasn't sure if they were still on the topic of slaves.  
"Koyu, I . . . don't understand."

Koyu made a sound that could be a short bark of laughter.  
"No, of course you don't. I'm not making much sense. I need a break."

Koyu closed the distance between them. He undid Shuei's obi.

"Koyu, what are you doing?"

"Undressing you."

"I know that! But, why?"

"The better to have sex with you."  
Koyu deadpanned.

Shuei caught Koyu's hands just as his outer skirt fell to the ground.  
"Wait! You want to take a break in the middle of a fight to have sex?"

"Uh-huh. You don't approve?"

". . . . ! ! ! !"

"I'll explain everything after sex. Deal?"

[Time lapse]

Rolling onto his side, Koyu slowly traced the scars on Shuei's torso with his fingers.  
"Shuei, the fight was already over just now. But I wanted to have a serious talk with you, and as Lord Reishin says, men . . . "

". . . talk better after sex."  
Shuei laughed.  
"Alright, Koyu, I'm all primed. Shoot."

Koyu's pale grey eyes were serious and thoughtful.  
"Shuei, what my mother said about your brother sounds a lot like you. You hang on every word I utter. No, more like pounce on it. Like that time when I mentioned, in passing, that I liked mushrooms. The next thing I knew, I was inundated with seventeen types of mushrooms, and we ate practically nothing but mushrooms for the next week."

Stroking Shuei gently to soften the impact of his words, Koyu continued.  
"Your attentiveness scares me, Shuei. To the extent that I no longer dare to make casual remarks on anything. Unfortunately, you have very good long term memory! You retained what I said one month after we met, about fathering children, all these three years, and now we end up with a slave that I don't want."

Shuei looked stricken.  
"Koyu, I'm sorry, I . . . mmmphh."

Koyu kissed Shuei, gently, tenderly.  
"I love you, Shuei. And I know that's your way of showing that you love me. But you don't need to, uh, work so hard. Everything about you tells me that you love me."

At the question in the violet eyes, Koyu said.  
"See, your body."

Smiling fondly, Koyu placed his hand over Shuei's cleanly-shaven pubic area.  
"Here's the tattoo that says 'Property of Li Koyu'."

Koyu's face became serious. His hand brushed lightly across Shuei's abdomen, chest, and down his back.  
"Here, here, here, here, here, and here, are the scars from your two months of hell. And yet, you snapped out of that self-destructive mode because I needed you."

Taking Shuei's face in his hands, Koyu went on.  
"And here. Your eyes tell me that you love me. Shuei, you don't have to over-compensate for not being able to say the words 'I love you'. I already know the reason you can't utter those words. And the reason, in itself, shows me how much you love me."

Koyu paused, smiled, and gave the side of Shuei's head a light smack with the heel of his hand. Shuei laughed. That was Shuei's signature smack for when Koyu was ranting and needed to be stopped.  
"You, we, got to get past this, Shuei. Our relationship needs to grow, _especially_ as we intend to become parents. Deal?"

Shuei caught Koyu's hand, post-smack, and kissed it.  
"Deal. I promise to grow up, Li Koyu."

He held on to Koyu's hand.  
"Koyu, I decided to buy a slave because I wanted us to be part of the pregnancy. And in the event that we want more children, they can be true siblings. And also, I would feel better if I could repay their mother by looking after her material needs at least, for the rest of her life. I was totally prepared to give her her freedom later if she wishes. I know all that is not relevant now, but I just don't want you to think that I'm a monster."

Koyu cupped his other hand over Shuei's hand, sandwiching it, caressing it.  
"I know you're not a monster, Shuei."

"Thank you!"  
Shuei paused.  
"Koyu, I promised Rin that she can stay."

"Alright, but on one condition."  
Koyu grinned.

* * *

Rin looked around the large hall, nervous but excited. All these grand people, gathered here just for her! She brushed down, for the umpteenth time, her deep indigo dress. Koyu came up to her, for no apparent reason, smiled reassuringly, and left to speak to Reishin and Kijin. Rin scanned the room, looking for Shuei.

Shuei walked through the door, shoulder to shoulder with a man that resembled him. Rin was impressed with his elegantly coiffed hair. Rin greeted Shuei just as they approached her.

"Father Shuei!"

Shuei perceptibly glowed with pleasure. Hana noted it with immense amusement. He turned to Rin and said kindly,  
"So you are Rin. You are very beautiful. I'm Shuei's elder brother."

"Oh! The triplets uncles! I'm honoured to meet you!"

Hana smiled warmly.  
"Me too. My brothers apologize for not being able to come today. This is our gift to you."

Rin received the gift with both hands. It was a three-part ribbon. She had never seen anything like it. Two gold rings linked the three sections of indigo satin ribbons. It was beautiful, and very elegant. Just like the uncle who gave it to her.  
"Thank you, Uncle Setsuna. It is gorgeous! Three linked ribbons from the three triplets uncles, yes?"

Hana nodded. He turned to Shuei.  
"Your daughter's very bright, little brother. By the way, where's Father Koyu?"

As Hana approached them, Kijin glanced at Reishin in concern. Reishin sensed it, and smiled at him in silent acknowledgement of his support. The four men chatted for a while. Hana handed Koyu his mother's ring, for his daughter. Koyu excused himself immediately.

Hana shocked Reishin by embracing him.  
"Thank you for loving my brother, Lord Reishin."

Reishin turned his head slightly, and deliberately placed his hand on his hair. Hana's eyes followed the action, and saw the blue ribbon wound around Reishin's ponytail.

Hana smiled, and released Reishin from his embrace.  
"Lord Reishin, under Koyu's mother's care, the rose bush has grown beautifully. It was in full bloom just before I left for Kyo. Unfortunately the blooms will not survive the journey."  
He produced a small package.  
"She's dried the rose petals for you."

A slight commotion caused all three of them to look over at Rin. Koyu, in trying to restyle Rin's hair to accommodate the three-part ribbon, had caused her headpiece to topple off her head. Shuei, laughing, picked it off the floor, and held it in place while Koyu secured it with the long golden hairpins.

Hana smiled, Reishin half-smiled, Kijin did so too, behind his mask, at the domesticity of the scene, at the new extension to their families.

**[The End]**

**

* * *

**

Notes:

**1) Reishin's advice, that men talk better after sex, was given to Koyu in chapter 4 of my fanfic Twin Irises. With that advice in mind, Koyu attempted to seduce Shuei. ^_^**

**2) Shuei's over-attentiveness to Koyu was hinted at very early on in their relationship, in chapter 5 of my fanfic Twin Irises. By that time, Koyu had already learnt the prudence of stopping himself from making casual comments.**

**3) The story behind the "Property of Li Koyu" tattoo was mentioned in my fanfic Unconventional Gifts.**

**4)The reason behind Shuei not being able to say "I love you" to Koyu was given in my fanfic The Melting Snow Party.**


End file.
